Saturday, 23 August 2008


I'm panicking a bit right now.

I don't know if I can do this for 4 months - I KNOW people keep saying it's not a long time, I'm sick of hearing that to be honest, but I really miss Hans. It really does feel like there is somethng missing, i can't settle. It IS a long time to be apart from someone you live with and spend so much time with, if you don't think it is just try it >:-[

I have been wondering how hard it would be to just come home. I mean, I haven't registered for anything on the course yet. The place is beautiful, and they school looks great, it feels like everything is going on behind thick glass and i can see it but not be a part of it. I would be loving this so much if Hans was here, just how it was earlier in the week. I feel I have alot to lose either way. If I stay I face being miserable and 4 months feeling like 400 years, and if I go back I have wasted time and money, and I might never forgive myself - I have never given up on anything before.

I don't know what to do.
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